


Anime Is Real

by pacifistmoments



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Gen, Gender-Neutral Frisk, Humor, POV Third Person, Spoilers - Pacifist Route
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-04-07
Updated: 2016-04-12
Packaged: 2018-05-31 21:48:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,431
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6488749
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pacifistmoments/pseuds/pacifistmoments
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Frisk must navigate an extreme sports obsessed Underground with only a pair of roller skates.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Gauntlet of Deadly Terror

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ask not for whom the Cool Skeleton poses. It poses for thee.

Snow slid away under Papyrus’ feet as he struggled up the steep embankment with his snowboard on his back. Any other creature would have run out of breath long ago, but not MASTER MOUNTAIN CLIMBER PAPYRUS. He was a cool skeleton and being a cool skeleton required certain feats that other monsters might have considered impossible.

Case in point: he needed to be at the top of this peak, striking a cool pose before the human arrived. And Papyrus knew they were close. Only moments ago, the Greater Dog had arrived, hopped on a waiting sled (dogs almost always preferred sleds to snowboards), and ridden downhill to Snowdin. That meant they were no longer keeping the Human busy.

No matter, he, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, had made it to the top. The Human would be SO IMPRESSED when they saw him, a lone figure posing dramatically from the imposing peak.

*hey bro

Papyrus stopped dead in his tracks. Somehow, his brother was already here. And he was… doing wheelies on his unicycle?

STOP THAT! THE HUMAN WILL BE HERE SOON! YOU WILL MAKE A WEIRD IMPRESSION!

*ok

AND DON’T START AGAIN WHEN THEY GET HERE.

*ok

In all honesty, Papyrus was quite happy to see that his lazy brother had come to bare witness to his moment of triumph. But still, Sans needed a lot of looking after. If Papyrus didn’t spend the time to spell things out for him, Sans was liable to make a complete fool of himself in front of the Human.

*bro, who’s that doing a sick grind off of your spike trap?

OH NO! SANS! THE HUMAN IS HERE! AND I’M NOT POSING YET!

*hey, how about you pose with that cool snow poff?

WHAT? SANS! HOW COULD YOU SAY THAT? I WOULD NEVER POSE WITH A SNOW POFF!

Papyrus deftly swung the snowboard from his back. Never mind his brother’s strange ideas. Papyrus knew he already had everything that he needed to strike a cool pose right here. He just needed a place a plant the snowboard.

WAIT! THAT SNOW POFF! IT’S PERFECT!

Papyrus slammed the snowboard a foot into the snow poff so that it stood upright, clearly displaying the awesome skull and crossbones insignia Undyne had helped him paint on the bottom to show off to any humans who crossed his path.

Papyrus straightened his spine, puffed out his rib cage, and snapped his goggles into place before leaning casually on his snowboard. The wind gently captured his cape making it flutter ever so slightly. When the Human arrived, the first thing they would see would be a cool skeleton standing on the opposite side of the ravine.

*wow, so cool, bro.

And also Sans, balanced perfectly on a unicycle. Whatever. It was too late to help his brother into a cooler pose now. The Human had stopped on the other side of the ravine and was staring across at them. Papryus cleared his throat.

HUMAN! THIS IS YOUR FINAL AND MOST DANGEROUS CHALLENGE!  
BEHOLD! THE GAUNTLET OF DEADLY TERROR!

Undyne had helped him design this awesome gauntlet too. And somehow she had even convinced Dr. Alphys to make it activate by voice command. The effect was perfect for a cool skeleton like himself. Even as he uttered the word Terror, the basic track of the gauntlet rose up out of the snow all down the slope leading to Snowdin.

WHEN I SAY THE WORD, IT WILL FULLY ACTIVATE!  
CANNONS WILL FIRE! SPIKES WILL SWING! BLADES WILL SLICE!  
EACH PART WILL SWING VIOLENTLY UP AND DOWN!  
ONLY THE TINIEST CHANCE OF VICTORY WILL REMAIN!  
ARE YOU READY?

The Human just stared at him. Clearly they were too impressed by his cool pose for words. Had he gone too far?

BECAUSE!

He already knew the Human admired him.

I!

It was obvious from their every action.

AM!

They had consumed the specially prepared spaghetti he left to slow them down.

ABOUT!

They had skated with ease through his invisible electricity maze.

TO DO IT!

Papyrus stared at the human. They had proven themselves with those pink and blue skates time and again, but now they were caked with snow and ice. What would happen if a wheel locked up mid-gauntlet? The Human might fall. They might get hurt.

*well? what’s the hold up?

HOLD UP? WHAT HOLD UP?  
I’M… I’M ABOUT TO ACTIVATE IT NOW!

The Human was still staring at him, still too impressed and intimidated by his coolness to say anything. Papyrus had never before thought of his coolness as a curse. WAIT, NO. His coolness wasn’t a curse. It was warning him about a potential misstep! A cool skeleton wouldn’t risk harming this poor friendless Human. He only wanted to capture them after all.

*that, uh, doesn’t look very activated.

WELL! THIS CHALLENGE! IT SEEMS… MAYBE…  
TOO EASY TO DEFEAT THE HUMAN WITH.  
YEAH! WE CAN’T USE THIS ONE!  
I AM A SKELETON WITH STANDARDS!  
MY PUZZLES ARE VERY FAIR!  
AND MY TRAPS ARE EXPERTLY COOKED!  
BUT THIS METHOD IS TOO DIRECT!  
NO CLASS AT ALL! AWAY IT GOES!

The gauntlet sank back into the snow just as quickly as it emerged.

PHEW!

What a huge relief that his coolness had guided him to the proper decision. Undyne would be disappointed her gauntlet design never got a practical test run, but so long as he found another way to capture the human she would also be impressed. So impressed that she’d have to let him join the Royal Derby.

Speaking of the Human, why were they still staring at him?

WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT?  
THIS WAS ANOTHER DECISIVE VICTORY FOR PAPYRUS!  
NYEH! HEH! HEH! ... HEH?

Papyrus yanked his board out of the snow poff. This hadn’t been a waste of time. He had discovered the human’s weakness. They were stricken with an intense desire to impress him! He would beat them to the other end of Snowdin, wait in a blinding snowstorm, and there… well, a cool skeleton like him would surely figure something out.

-

Meanwhile, In Reality

-

*NNRRRRGH. I can’t take it anymore. You’re already to the part with Snowdin, right? Tell me what you think.

Alphys glanced up from the papers piled in her lap to look at Undyne.

*W-what exactly is this that I’m reading?

*The script for our very own Historical Anime! I already showed this to Frisk and they loved it!

*But it doesn’t seem very… accurate? I don't think Frisk even owns a pair of roller skates.

*So what? I mean, at first I was disappointed to learn that the human histories were greatly exaggerated. But then I realized that the humans had actually taken something that was probably boring, dry garbage and made it awesome! And then I thought, we could do that too!

Undyne grinned and Alphys couldn’t help but blush. She looked down at the papers again.

*Well, I suppose, now that we’re on the surface, we do need to think about ways to bridge the divide between us and the Humans.

*Alright! I knew I could count on you, Alphys.

*C-count on me? For what?

*To turn it into an anime. Obviously. You’re the resident expert on the stuff and now that you’ve been fired from your position as royal scientist I know you have waaay too much free time.

*But I can’t- I don’t-

*No worries. I’ve already talked to Asgore. He felt bad that his wife fired you, so he’s willing to hire you as the assistant to the Royal Historian! That’s me!

*Oh. My. God.

*Just think about it. You. Me. Endless hours of anime.

*I can’t believe it. I’m about to agree to this. No. I- I can’t waver at a time like this. Undyne! I’ll do it! I’ll help you make an anime. …(I have no idea how to make an anime)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next Chapter: Grillby's Is Not A Skate Park


	2. Grillby's Is Not A Skate Park

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Looks like there's a new New Kid in town.

M.K. sat perched on a tall chair at the back of Grillby’s, licking the salt and grease from their snout as they stared out the window. It wasn’t easy eating fries with no hands, but when half the other patrons were dogs, nobody commented much about the politeness of shoving your face directly into the fry basket.

Sadly, there were only a few fries left in the basket now and those were cold. M.K. glanced towards the closed door with its impossible knob, then down at the brown and yellow roller skates leaning against each other in their lap, then towards the other patrons of Grillby’s. Nobody looked like they were planning to leave any time soon. 

That was the trouble with the usual crowd. They hung around forever and M.K. hated having to ask for someone to open the door.

M.K. sighed and returned their attention to the window. The bear that always loitered outside was talking to a stranger. They were short and kinda hairy, much like most residents of Snowdin, but oddly, only on the top of their head. M.K. wasn’t sure they’d ever seen someone quite like this before, but they were wearing red and blue striped roller skates and that could mean only one thing: there was a new kid in town.

Moments later the door to Grillby’s swung open and the new kid entered and rolled straight up to the counter where Grillby was busily polishing an empty glass.

*...  
*...  
*...

The fellow sitting at the counter leaned over with a helpful translation. 

*Grillbz says he'd offer you a seat, but this isn't a skate park. 

*...  
*...  
*...

*Next time, please take your skates off at the door.

The kid’s cheeks reddened with realization and they nodded, then knelt down to undo the laces. M.K. thought the kid would stand back up and order something once the skates were off, but instead they padded around the restaurant in their socks, going up to one patron after another.

*The capital’s getting pretty crowded, so I’ve heard they’re going to start moving here.  
*Hmm... I don’t want to see the erasure of our local culture.  
*But I definitely want to see some city slickers slip onto their butts.

M.K. rolled their eyes. It hadn’t been that long since their parents had packed up and moved the whole family out here to this middle of nowhere place. It would be nice to have newer new kids around. Plus, all the local kids played with ice skates. Nobody else had an interest in rollers.

*Those dogs are part of the ROYAL DERBY. The elite sports team led by UNDYNE.  
*She’s rude, loud, and beats up everyone who gets in her way…  
*It’s no wonder all the kids want to be like her when they grow up!

So true! Undyne was the best. She was strong and fast and on a skate board nobody could touch her. She probably never had to ask anyone for help in her entire life. If a door ever got in her way she’d just beat it up and then ollie over it on her way out.

The kid moved to the Royal Derby dogs next. Oddly, they already seemed to be on good terms. This kid really got around fast. M.K. marveled at the kid’s boldness. They’d probably end up being super popular within the first week at school. And now they were headed this way!

*Yo! You’re a kid too right?

The kid nodded.

*Ha ha! I knew it! I could tell cause you have striped roller skates.

The kid studied M.K. with a neutral expression. It was hard to tell what they were thinking. For someone who behaved so socially, they were kinda quiet. After a moment of silence the kid turned and began to walk towards the door. In a flash, M.K. realized the kid was about to leave.

*Hey, wait up.

M.K. grabbed their skates with their mouth and hopped off the chair, following the kid to the door. The kid patiently held the door open until they were both outside, then sat down in the snow and began to put their skates back on. M.K. dropped their own skates and tried to slip their feet inside. It was kinda tricky, but M.K. always got them back on eventually.

The other kid finished with their skates and stood just in time to see M.K. fall face first into the snow as their own skate slid away from their foot. Not one to be deterred, M.K. picked themself up and used their tail to slide the skate into the side of grillby’s. With the skate propped against a solid wall, M.K. finally forced their foot all the way inside. 

That was one down. M.K. wondered if the kid would wait for them to get both on. But when M.K. turned around to make a go at the second skate, the kid was kneeling, holding it open for them.

*Ha ha, thanks dude.

This kid was so nice. They were even snapping the strap buttons into place without being asked. Despite being polite, quiet, and gentle, the kid had a sort of competent confidence that reminded M.K. of someone else. And that meant... They were probably amazing with those roller blades.

*Yo. I have an idea.  
*You know about Undyne right? But have you ever seen her before?

The kid shook their head.

*Ha ha, I thought so. She’s the coolest. I wanna be just like her when I grow up.  
*Actually, sometimes she comes to Snowdin.  
*But we don’t have to wait for that. Cause I know a secret.  
*Once a day, right around lunch time, she meets with a skeleton on the outskirts of Waterfall.  
*Yo, you like meeting people right?  
*We could totally sneak out and see her right now!

The kid stood very still. They looked up and down the length of Snowdin and then seemed to think.

*Ha ha, you still want to check out more of the town, don’t you?  
*Don’t worry, I’ll go on ahead and wait for you.  
*Just don’t take too long or I’ll have to see her without you!

The kid nodded and the two headed off in different directions. By the time M.K. reached the blinding snow storm just out of town, all they could think about was how cool it was gonna be to see Undyne again. They barely noticed the shadowed figure of a tall skeleton posing patiently with a snowboard as they skated past.

-

Meanwhile, In Reality

-

Alphys paused to chew thoughtfully on the pen she had been using to make notes in the margins. Almost immediately, Undyne’s shadow fell over her.

*What? What’s wrong with it? What part don’t you like?

Alphys dropped the pen with a squeak. She put her hand to her heart and took a few deep breaths before answering.

*Nothing. It’s fine. I mean, aside from maybe a few minor changes-

*Changes!?

*W-well, you know… 

*There’s not enough action right? Nrrrgh, I knew I should have included an explosion in that Grillby’s scene.

*W-what? No, that’s not-

*But Frisk spent so much time helping people. I want to make them AWESOME, but Asgore keeps reminding me that it’s supposed to be historical too. Maybe I should get Gerson in on this. He’s written history books that weren’t totally lame.

*Actually, um, I only paused because it just occurred to me. Why did you start the story at the, uh, at the door to the ruins? Shouldn’t it start when Queen Toriel meets Frisk?

*Oh that? That’s easy! You don’t have any cameras in the ruins so I have NO IDEA what happened there!

*W-wait, so you haven’t talked to Queen Toriel about this project at all?

*NOPE!

*But she does know about it?

*NOPE!

*Asgore gave you the funding to make a Historical Anime and never told his wife?

*~PROBABLY!

*B-but, if she finds out before we tell her-

(KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK)

*Oh. My. God.

(KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK)

*We are all so dead.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next Chapter: Bonetrousled!  
> *Finally, some action!


	3. Bonetrousled

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Your soul is red  
> Now it is blue  
> Pasta is tasty  
> Let me catch you?

Papyrus stared at his wrist. He wasn’t sure, because he didn’t have a watch and the blinding snowstorm made it difficult to see his hand clearly, but it seemed like the Human was taking an awful long time. Had they gotten lost on the long street of Snowdin? Had they taken a wrong turn and walked straight into the river? Those were things that might happened to even the coolest of skeletons. Who knew if a Human could fair even half as well?

Papyrus was beginning to think he should return to town to look for the wayward Human, but at that moment, the silhouette of something short and unsymmetrical materialized before him in the snowstorm.

THAT SHAPE. I’D RECOGNIZE IT ANYWHERE.  
THAT IS THE SHAPE OF A LAMP!  
HMM. BUT WHY WOULD A LAMP BE APPROACHING ME IN A SNOWSTORM?

Papyrus rubbed at his jaw with a gloved hand.

AHA! THOUGHT YOU COULD PULL ONE OVER ON ME, HUH?  
WELL, MASTER DETECTIVE PAPYRUS IS NEVER FOOLED!  
NYEH HEH HEH!

He jabbed his hand accusingly at the silhouette.

SANS! YOU WILL CEASE THIS PRANK AT ONCE!  
I AM AWAITING THE HUMAN!  
I MUST TELL THEM SOMETHING!  
SOMETHING FROM THE DEPTHS OF MY BONY HEART!  
AND I HAVE NEITHER THE TIME  
NOR THE SPACE  
TO DEAL WITH YOUR LAMP!

At that moment the blizzard abated just enough for Papyrus to see the Human standing in the space where the lamp had been only moments before. That was Sans for you: pull a childish prank one moment, then apologize by swapping lamps with people the next. It’s just the sort of thing brothers do.

Papyrus gripped his snowboard tightly, holding it a foot from his side in an appropriately cool pose. He cleared his throat.

HUMAN.  
YOU TOOK SUCH A LONG TIME TO COME HERE  
THAT IT GAVE ME TIME TO THINK...  
THE VIGOR WITH WHICH YOU CONSUMED MY HOMEMADE PASTA  
THE WAY YOU THREW YOURSELF AT MY RAIL GRINDING CHALLENGES  
THE LONG, SILENT STARES OF ADMIRATION WHILE I SPOKE  
OH LONELY HUMAN...  
IT IS CLEAR THAT YOU WANT DESPERATELY TO IMPRESS ME!  
I UNDERSTAND! AFTER ALL, I AM VERY GREAT!  
WORRY NOT! ALTHOUGH I COULD CAPTURE YOU EASILY  
I SHALL GIVE YOU THE CHANCE...

Papyrus let go of his snowboard. It fell forward and he stepped onto it. The straps automagically bound to his boots.

SHOW ME WHAT YOU CAN DO!  
AND THEN...  
AND THEN!  
I WILL FULFILL MY LIFELONG DREAM!  
POWERFUL! POPULAR! PRESTIGIOUS!  
THAT’S PAPYRUS!  
THE NEWEST MEMBER OF THE ROYAL DERBY!

As a monster personally trained by Undyne in the art of EXTREME SPORTS, Papyrus had long ago learned how to tap into his own SOUL AURA, something essential if you wanted to use magic to perform sicker and sweeter tricks. And as he had learned to control his own Aura, he had also gained the ability to see the Soul Auras of others. 

The Human’s natural Soul Aura, for instance, was RED. Usually this Red Aura was invisible, tucked away inside of the Human, but once an extreme challenge was made it rose out to encompass them, filling the Human with their own natural power, lending them the strength to meet the challenge. Papyrus could see it now, pulsing around them like a steady heart beat.

Papyrus made no move of this own, but instead prepared a bone attack as he waited to see what the Human would do. He would start off with something simple. Maybe three bones? That seemed too easy for one as great as he, but he didn’t want to accidentally push the Human too hard. The first attacks should only be to gauge the Human’s skill and to give them the chance to impress him. They deserved that much.

But the Human was just standing there. Were they too impressed and intimidated by his mere presence to respond? Were they at a loss for how to best impress him? Papyrus decided to offer some encouragement.

HUMAN, I-

Suddenly, they moved! They raised their right hand and gave Papyrus a thumbs up!

WHAT? FL-FLIRTING?  
SO YOU FINALLY REVEAL YOUR ULTIMATE FEELINGS!  
W-WELL, I’M A SKELETON WITH VERY HIGH STANDARDS!

The Human didn’t hesitate. They raised their left hand in a second thumbs up! It was right beside the first! Two thumbs up! Directed at him simultaneously! 

OH NO! YOU MUST BE VERY SERIOUS ABOUT THIS!  
THAT PASSION! THAT BRAVERY!  
PUTTING YOUR HEART INTO ALL THAT YOU DO!  
IT REMINDS ME... OF MYSELF!  
I GUESS THIS MEANS I HAVE TO GO ON A DATE WITH YOU...?

Papyrus felt so flustered at this realization that his three bone attack passed harmlessly to either side of the stationary Human. They flashed him another double thumbs up. This aggressive flirting- it was almost too much to bear!

LET’S DATE L-LATER. AFTER I’VE CAPTURED YOU.

The Human’s hands dropped to their sides and Papyrus launched another three bone attack. The Human seemed disappointed as they scissor skated easily around the bones and then slid to a halt. Clearly they had wanted to date him immediately. 

All at once, the Human’s red aura flared out and a feeling of intense determination washed over him. The Human stepped back a few feet, then skated to the side, gaining speed as they went, then leapt and did a complete 360 in the air, landing smoothly on their left foot and arcing back around to stop where they had begun. They bowed and Papyrus clapped. That had been a very slick trick. It gave him the itch to perform a few of his own.

SO, YOU HAVE TRIED TO IMPRESS ME HUMAN.  
AS I PROMISED YOU WOULD HAVE THE CHANCE TO DO.  
I ADMIT! I AM IMPRESSED!  
BUT.  
I THINK.  
MAYBE YOU COULD IMPRESS ME A LITTLE MORE?  
LET’S SEE HOW YOU HANDLE MY FABLED ‘BLUE ATTACK’!

Papyrus tapped into his own Soul Aura easily. A wall of snow bones rose up all around the pair, caging them in an arena from which there could be no escape. At the same time, Papyrus projected out an inescapable array of bones formed entirely of his own Aura. They glowed a brilliant BLUE. Bone after bone struck the Human only to pass through them harmlessly and out the other side. 

Or so they thought. While it was true a Blue Attack would only hurt the Human if they moved, Undyne had taught him how to take this one step further. Papyrus could hardly keep back a NYEH HEH HEH to celebrate his own clever trap. Whether the Human realized it or not, Papyrus could see it clearly. The Human’s Aura had shifted.

Casually, Papyrus tossed a single bone their way. The Human clearly hadn’t been expecting this and barely had time to throw themselves out of the way. As the bone flew harmlessly by the Human tried to stop, but realized to their horror that they couldn’t. They rolled and just kept on rolling until they collided with a POFF into the wall of snow bones.

The Human pealed their face out of the wall of snow, but even the act of pushing away from it sent them rolling backwards towards the other side of the arena. It was impossible for them to stop.

YOU’RE BLUE NOW!  
THAT’S MY ATTACK!

Papyrus felt giddy. He could no longer hold it in.

NYEH HEH HEH  
HEH HEH HEH  
HEH HEH HEH

POFF

Still sailing backwards across the arena, the Human had crashed hiney first into the snow bones at the opposite end of the arena. They stood there, partially embedded with their arms outstretched gritting their teeth. Finally, they pushed off again, but set their skates at an angle which put them into a wide arc around the arena. They couldn’t stop themselves from moving, but they could steer. 

Papyrus tossed a few more bones. Ahead of them. Behind. The Human swerved to avoid the bones, but they both knew the Human was having a harder time now that they couldn’t stop. 

I CAN ALMOST TASTE MY FUTURE POPULARITY!  
PAPYRUS: HEAD OF THE ROYAL DERBY!  
PAPYRUS: UNPARALLELED SPAGETTORE!

The Human crouched low under a spinning bone and did a half spin that set them immediately skating in the opposite direction. So, they were still trying to impress him even now? Well, it was a very clever use of their Soul State. The very essence of the challenge required that he step up his game too.

As Papyrus sent another volley of bones after the Human, he again tapped into his Soul and called out the name of his attack just like Undyne had said a cool skeleton should do.

BLUE BONE PULSE!

A giant wall of blue bones shot across the arena. The Human swerved around his regular bones only to face an unavoidable blue wall which rapidly bore down on them. They couldn’t stop and let the wall pass harmlessly through them this time. They were still blue. They couldn’t stop at all.

UNDYNE WILL BE REALLY PROUD OF ME!

The wall slammed into the moving Human.

THE KING WILL TRIM A HEDGE IN THE SHAPE OF MY SMILE!

The bones passed through the Human and continued on, but not harmlessly like before. The Human’s aura had dimmed. It beat, but slower. Enough hits like that and this challenge would end. The Human would lack the power to avoid capture.

MY BROTHER WILL... WELL HE WON’T CHANGE VERY MUCH.

The force of the last attack had brought the Human to their knees. As Papyrus watched the Human pick themself up out of the snow, he felt a twinge of regret. His next bone attack slipped from his gloved hand. It fell almost silently into the snow.

I’LL HAVE LOTS OF ADMIRERS, BUT...  
WILL ANYONE LIKE ME AS SINCERELY AS YOU?  
SOMEONE LIKE YOU IS REALLY RARE  
AND DATING MIGHT BE KIND OF HARD  
AFTER YOU’RE CAPTURED AND SENT AWAY...

The Human stood and brushed the snow off of their sweater and pants, then looked across the arena at Papryus. They stared at each other for a long moment and then the Human raised their right hand and shot Papryus another thumbs up. He looked away from them uncomfortably.

URGH! WHO CARES? GIVE UP!  
GIVE UP OR FACE MY SPECIAL ATTACK!

Papyrus prepared another mixed attack of blue and regular bones. Hitting that wall had broken the momentum which was forcing the Human into constant movement, but that was no matter. The regular bones forced the human to move again. They skated nimbly past bone after bone, ducking under some, twirling around others. They really seemed into it now. There was a grace to their movements, a fluidity that left Papyrus mesmerized. He barely remembered to shout out the name of his attack.

BLUE BONE PULSE!

Another inescapable wall of Soul Aura shot across the arena, but this time it seemed the Human had something in mind. As they dodged the last of the regular bones they looped around towards the blue wall and charged it. What were they doing? Papyrus had told them to give up, but he hadn’t meant they should purposefully run into his attacks. After he had captured them there would have to be a talk about their recklessness. 

The Human leapt, tucking their arms in with both hands placed over their heart, and spun. As the wall hit them and passed through to the other side, Papyrus’ jaw fell open. The rapid midair spin had kept their relative position stationary and rendered his Blue Soul Attack harmless. Amazing. Would the Human stop at nothing to impress him?

VERY WELL THEN. BEHOLD!  
MY ‘SPECIAL ATTACK’!

Papyrus lifted a bone over his head, pointing it up towards the heavens, and poured his Aura into it in wave after wave until it crackled with Blue Aura. This was the end. No matter how cool and impressive the Human was, they would never be able to stand against his Special Attack.

BLUE!  
SOUL!  
ANNIHIL-

A small white dog sprang from out of nowhere and pulled the bone from Papyrus’ hand. It ran a few feet off from him and wagged it’s tail.

WHAT THE HECK! THAT’S MY SPECIAL ATTACK!  
HEY! YOU STUPID DOG DO YOU HEAR ME?  
STOP MUNCHING ON THAT BONE!

The dog looked up at Papyrus with large, adorable, and undoubtedly evil eyes. It yipped a cute and devious yip. And then it bounded off, disappearing through a small white dog with a bone in its mouth shaped hole in the arena wall.

MY SPECIAL ATTACK!  
...OH WELL  
I’LL JUST USE A REALLY COOL REGULAR ATTACK!

Papyrus called a single Blue Bone to his hand and gave his snowboard a dispirited tap. All at once the snowboard lurched forward, carrying a despondent Papyrus with it.

SIGH...  
HERE COMES AN ABSOLUTELY NORMAL ATTACK.

Papyrus rode his board in circles around the Human, launching bones and blue bones from all sides. But the human always seemed to be one step ahead, hopping and twirling away and through the very center of his most deadly attacks. But Papyrus wasn’t done yet. Oh no. You couldn’t find even a single letter from the word done within his name! 

Snow bones rose up from the ground throughout the entire arena, even under the feet of the Human. But the Human simply rode them up, higher and higher until at last they ramped off of the tallest and over the wall of his snow bone arena. UNBELIEVABLE! The Human had gotten past him and now Papyrus knew that his magic was spent. Sadly, the word spent had several letters in common with his name...

The walls to his arena came tumbling down.

WELL. ‘HUFF’ IT’S CLEAR... YOU CAN’T ‘HUFF’ DEFEAT ME...  
BUT I SUPPOSE ‘HUFF’ I AM VERY IMPRESSED...

Papyrus let his head droop.

UNDYNE’S GOING TO BE DISAPPOINTED IN ME  
I’LL NEVER JOIN THE ROYAL DERBY AND...  
AND MY FRIEND QUANTITY WILL REMAIN STAGNANT

The Human turned and skated back to him. They wrapped their arms around his waist in a big hug.

D-DOES THIS MEAN YOU WANT TO BE FRIENDS WITH ME?  
W-WELL THEN. I GUESS I CAN MAKE AN ALLOWANCE FOR YOU.  
WOWIE! WE HAVEN’T EVEN HAD OUR FIRST DATE  
AND I’VE ALREADY MANAGED TO HIT THE FRIEND ZONE.  
I HERE BY GRANT YOU PERMISSION TO PASS THOUGH!

-

Meanwhile, In Reality

-

Alphys, Undyne, Queen Toriel, and Frisk all sat around the kitchen table. It was a gathering filled with quiet sounds. Undyne’s pencil scratching marks onto paper, the Queen occasionally turning a page, Frisk humming to themself as they doodled something on the back of Undyne’s scrapped drafts, and Alphys tapping desperate searches for ‘how to produce an anime’ into her phone...

*Ah...

Everyone looked up from their separate endeavors. The Queen had reached the final page.

*Is this all of it then?

Undyne gave the queen a strained smile.

*For now. 

*Oh, but what about-

The Queen nodded at the page in front of Undyne.

*NO! It’s not ready yet!

*A-actually, Queen Toriel, w-we were hoping you, uh, we t-thought maybe you would-

*You would like me to tell you want happened in the ruins, would you not?

*Y-yes, that is w-what I was trying to say.

*Oh my. Alphys, you needn’t be so nervous around me.  
*I am just a silly old woman who worries too much.  
*Especially when my child has taken to drawing such dangerous pictures.

Everyone turned to look at Frisk. They held up their artwork proudly for all to see. It was a surprisingly well drawn picture of themself in roller skates facing off against Papyrus. 

*Fuhuhuhu! You’re drawing me Fan Art? That’s my little nerd! Com’ere you!

Undyne put Frisk into an affectionate headlock and gave them a noogie. The Queen looked uncomfortable.

*But you see the problem, do you not? No helmet. No shin or elbow guards. I would like to support you, but I’m afraid this little project of yours might be sending entirely the wrong message.

Undyne’s eyes bulged and she inadvertently squeezed Frisk until their eyes did too. Alphys knew she needed to say something quickly.

*W-well, we’re still in the drafting stages right now. If you’re willing to help with the project I-I’m sure your input will have a great effect on the final product.

*Well, I suppose. Since you wish to hear my part of the tale, I could just write that part of the story for you. Hmm... Yes, if I establish proper roller skating safety early on...

Undyne’s eyes bulged further. This was going to be a long night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next Chapter: Boss Monsters? Ruining _my_ AU?
> 
> *Howdy!  
> *I do have more planned for this Fic.  
> *Someday?  
> *It might be a bit of a wait.  
> *I want to give True Preset my full attention.  
> *If you were enjoying this one, well, sorry!  
> *You can always subscribe to get a notification of when I update again.  
> *In the meantime, why not check out True Preset?  
> *I'm updating that one quite frequently.


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